[He takes a breath. He's not good at this, but he's trying- trying to be better. To find a way to explain how he feels instead of just shutting Kavinsky out because the vulnerability feels uncomfortable.]
I'm not pissed.
I dunno, man. I just- you scared me, okay? and I still feel
[He didn't usually apologize, not for anything, but this one was genuine.]
I guess I could have approached the subject better I didn't mean to scare you
but you know nothing's going to happen to me I wouldn't do this if I thought something bad would really happen I just thought I thought it'd be something dumb and fun to do
[Maybe 'dumb' wasn't quite the right word when he was going to be helping contribute to research, but. He hated the idea that he'd made Ronan worried.]
[If something happened to you, I don't know what I'd do - that's the truth, but Ronan doesn't know how to say that. He thinks that Kavinsky already knows, anyway. And he doesn't want to make him feel bad for being careless even if it still sits uncomfortably on his skin.]
I care about you, jerk.
look if you trust her it's fine I'm not saying you cant have fun or do stupid shit
babe sweetheart love of my life I don't want to die I've got you to live for
I just I'll keep you updated, okay? you'll have your very own live feed to alchemy
[And he did trust Christine. He didn't think he'd be in danger or else he wouldn't have volunteered. She seemed like a genuinely nice person and he didn't think she wanted to hurt anyone, either.]
[It absolutely would have. He almost talks about Latin and the main reason he showed up for that was because he thought it was important to the dreaming. So even if the teacher sucked, Ronan still would have been able to stand it if it was about magic.]
[The hard part was not coming across as the horny chaos gremlin he really was while in someone else's apartment. That meant he couldn't laugh over being called mr. or Ronan saying he was scandalized.]
I'll do my best babe the purple seems to be going away on its own? but we'll see
you don't have to wait until the color's gone unless she's worried about it or something
i mean i might tease you about it but it's not like I mind
[Once he'd settled over Kavinsky not actually being in danger, he'd been a lot less concerned. Now he mostly, well. He wanted to flirt with his boyfriend and maybe call him mister in person, like they were back in Aglionby.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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I'm not pissed.
I dunno, man.
I just- you scared me, okay?
and I still feel
fuck I don't know.
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I'm sorry
[He didn't usually apologize, not for anything, but this one was genuine.]
I guess I could have approached the subject better
I didn't mean to scare you
but you know
nothing's going to happen to me
I wouldn't do this if I thought something bad would really happen
I just thought
I thought it'd be something dumb and fun to do
[Maybe 'dumb' wasn't quite the right word when he was going to be helping contribute to research, but. He hated the idea that he'd made Ronan worried.]
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I care about you, jerk.
look if you trust her
it's fine
I'm not saying you cant have fun or do stupid shit
I'm not that much of a hypocrite
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I just
look
babe
sweetheart
love of my life
I don't want to die
I've got you to live for
I just
I'll keep you updated, okay?
you'll have your very own live feed to alchemy
[And he did trust Christine. He didn't think he'd be in danger or else he wouldn't have volunteered. She seemed like a genuinely nice person and he didn't think she wanted to hurt anyone, either.]
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I know
I trust you
so what is this alchemy shit supposed to do
aside from making your skin glow
anyway?
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and night vision
I think you know which one I want to try for
[He didn't need luck when he had Ronan at his side, and he'd never needed courage.]
That evening
so night vision didn't happen
what do you think of my new look?
ps don't worry, she's working on fixing it
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but
it would be a great excuse to let me shave your head
;)
[Is he teasing? With Ronan, who knows?]
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the shaved head thing might look great on you but I doubt it'd look good on me
I like my hair
purple or not
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so yeah I hope she fixes it
but if not I promise I'll still make out with you
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yeah she's super embarrassed about it so she's working really hard
apparently in her world there's alchemy schools
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I mean
maybe aglionby would have sucked less with classes about magic and shit
or maybe I'd have sucked less anyway
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I'd totally pay attention to classes about magic
maybe you just weren't sucking at the right things
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they could make anything boring
but yeah I would too probably
[There's a pause as Ronan catches K's innuendo.]
you have a suggestion for better things to suck at?
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you're probably right
[But learning about magic still would've been fucking cool.]
uh-huh
my dick
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yeah?
mr. kavinsky i'm scandalized
[Ronan is absolutely not scandalized.]
but alright
when you get back
incentive to not take too long
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I'll do my best babe
the purple seems to be going away on its own?
but we'll see
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unless she's worried about it or something
i mean
i might tease you about it
but it's not like I mind
[Once he'd settled over Kavinsky not actually being in danger, he'd been a lot less concerned. Now he mostly, well. He wanted to flirt with his boyfriend and maybe call him mister in person, like they were back in Aglionby.]
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which is fair
i can't imagine it being longer than like
30 minutes tho?
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even more than I wanna see your face
and it's not that long i guess
so just get back here when you can
hopefully when i still like indulging you
or myself
however that works
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i'll be home before you know it
and i'll resurrect the mood if i have to